The Transformation Goddess Summer Writing series includes divine feminine articles written by women who agreed to share their personal journey of reclaiming their voices and speaking their truth, in the 3rd Annual Goddess Talk Sessions Global Event this September. If you enjoy Joni’s article, plan to join us this fall and get to know this wise and wonderful woman.
Recognizing our needs, dreams, and desires and expressing them is vital to our sense of personal fulfillment and empowerment. It is one of the most important keys to living in our Feminine Sovereignty. Here’s how I learned about it first hand last Christmas Eve.
It was cool in the late afternoon as I walking along the lake feeling the hollow pang of jealousy. A woman I follow online stirred the unwelcome state earlier that afternoon by seemingly “having it all”. She appeared more put together, more successful and more attractive than I had been feeling when I read her post. To an old place inside of me, it felt like she had all of the goodies.
She was one of a series of beautiful brown eyed, brown haired women that had provoked my envious little girl. You see when I was a very young I had a cute little cousin with big brown eyes and soft brown hair who seemed to get all of the goodies. Though only 4 months apart I was tall and gangly and she was petite with cherub cheeks. Everyone seemed to respond to her and I routinely felt unseen and unloved.
Remembering this as I walked by the lake I began to tend to my envious little girl. I summoned a golden light to hold her within me and promptly received a message, “I am loved and celebrated”. As I walked on I felt bathed in love by the world around me. The young girl within filled herself completely with all the love and celebration.
As I relaxed and received the next layer of the old story emerged- the scarcity fear that lives beneath the jealousy. The one that told me as a little girl if she get’s the goodies then I go without. I like so many of us had carried that belief unconsciously into adulthood.
I took a deep breath and opened to receive a deeper truth. Wisdom came flooding in, “there is more than enough for all of us.” And instantly I could see the evidence of that in the world around me. I could see the abundance in nature available to all of us – including me. I understood with this recognition I was healing the deep-seated scarcity and deprivation wounds of my maternal line. A mother line my cousin and I shared.
But the final piece of my healing came with the understanding, not only is there enough to go around but I can ask.
I can ask for what I need and use my voice to speak up on my behalf.
Perhaps you too were raised in a family, faith or culture that taught you to be selfless – to deny your wants and needs.
Maybe you internalized the belief you get the goodies by being a good girl, pleasing to others and by all means never demanding.
Or came to believe if you’re not receiving what you want and need it’s because you’re not enough – somehow you’re not worthy.
If you carried or still carry those disabling beliefs you’re not alone. For years I believed all those lies too.
The sad thing is, beliefs like this tie our hands and silence us. They cut us off from our personal power to create our own fulfillment. They give all the power to forces outside ourselves. And they foster envy and resentment that take us even further away from our power.
I’m here to tell you if you still carry old beliefs about being worthy or deserving you don’t have to earn the right to receive your heart’s desire. You don’t have to go without. You are free to ask.
It’s the Divine Masculine aspect of asserting what you want that allows you to receive all that you need and desire.
The whole of the Universe is literally at the ready to support you in making it happen. And others are typically happy to oblige if you’re clear and direct. But nothing can happen unless you ask.
That can be a hard pill to swallow if you’ve spent a lifetime doing without or doing it yourself rather than ask.
However, the truth is asking for what you want and need creates a pathway of healing for your self and of greater connection with others. It’s a very worthy practice.
Beloved, I invite you to practice asking for the next 7 days – ask for all you want and need – no matter how big or small. If resistance or emotions get stirred up it can be helpful to journal or speak to a friend. It gets easier as you practice.
Give it a try. You’re worth it and your Sovereignty and deep fulfillment depend on it.
Joni Advent Maher is a Spiritual Feminist and Transformational Coach who supports women to remember their Sacred nature and become inspired leaders in their lives, relationships, and worlds.
The founder of Revolutionary Heart, she works with wise, soulful women ready to create their vision, free their voice, stand in their value and increase their visibility.
You can listen to her podcast, Trust Your Sacred Feminine Flow on iTunes.
Meet Joni and learn about how she reclaimed her voice in the 3rd Annual Goddess Talk Sessions Global event this fall!
Photo by Meiying Ng on Unsplash